So a few weeks ago God really hit me with some awesome stuff and actually spoke to me through the word for the first time. It was pretty much super awesome and I was jacked up on what he said for a while. Anyways, well today in class God just reminded me about what He spoke to me about a few weeks ago.
Eph 6:10-20
The armor of God. I had forgotten about the armor that God has called us to put on. I always said I wanted to be a warrior for Jesus but I never could succeed or make progress because I never had the protection of God. I never prepared myself. I always fell to the accusations the enemy would come against me with. Then it hit me, I need to put on the armor of God and then I can fight.
We always get stuck on feelin pity on ourselves. We always get stuck and then keep asking God to save us from ourselves, when really we just need to actually stand up and fight. God has given us the tools we need to fight, now we need to walk in that and do it.
I hate when I am being attacked and all I do is ask for help without actually doing anything about it. God just began to burn it on my heart that I need to stand up. I need to prepare myself for the battle. I need to take action. I have power and I need to walk in it to have victory. I am done feeling sorry for myself and not fighting for myself.
Today God gave me another flame to stir the fire again. My heart is not okay with sitting idly by allowing the enemy to attack me. No longer, every morning I make the decision to protect myself against the attacks. I put on the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit. I put on the belt of truth with the breastplate of righteousness. (One of my favorite parts) AND fit your feet with the gospel of peace. So meaning even though you are "fighting" you are still rooted in peace from God.
My daily prayer is also that of Paul's "I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel...I am an ambassador...Pray that I may declare it fearlessly as I should"
Thursday, December 8
Thursday, December 1
Growth
So after two and a half years of really going hard core after God I can really begin to see a change in my life. Not that I haven't seen a change before today but I was just reflecting on the fact of how much I have changed. Yes I know there are some areas that don't seem like much growth but to me they are huge steps. (Im bout to get kinda personal...and tell a lil about my past...)
So I have had a past with quite a few guys and I used to kinda be proud of it. I used to "brag" about how many guys I'd fooled around with and I thought it was cool. (How is that cool?! You just look like a SLUT! ahaha, gahhh so dumb!) So anyways, I've recently decided that I am sick of the way I just let guys treat me or how I change just because of a guy. That's not me. I have changed in my heart but I haven't actaully done anything about it to show it outwardly. Well after mannnyyyyy long hours of debating whether or not I want to really take a stand on this I have decided that if I don't I am just leaving a door open to allow the enemy to attack me. I am serious, I am no longer playing the games everyone plays. I have played the games and I know how to play them well but it's not fun because I end up gettin attached or he gets attached more than we planned and I or he will get hurt. My heart can't handle being hurt anymore. Seriously, I think that if I have another heart break I will need serious counsel, I'm not kidding or exaggerating.
So I know it seems like a small step but to me it's huge. I have a clear boundary and proud of it. I have stopped responding to those guys that text me super late cause they are "bored" yeaahhh I'm not dumb, I know what you want. I also have decided that unless we are dating, flirting is all you get of me. I have self control and I know how to use it now and I will not back down. I don't like losing and this is a battle that I will win. I know to not even put myself in those situations where things could even lead to something more.
I know that this is a huge step in my life and I know that there is going to be opposition but I know that with God on my side I can do anything. If I stumble for some reason I am not going to beat myself up. I am going to get right back up on that horse and go even harder than before. I am old enough, wise enough, and more mature to just keep doing what I have done since high school. I am not that same person and there needs to be a outward change for everyone to see.
I normally would be upset that I even had to struggle with what to do because it would seem like such an easy decision to make for some but the fact I struggled whether or not to do this makes me that much stronger. I have gone back and forth over this and I know it may get hard but in the end I know it will be worth it and I will save myself so many emotional roller coster rides, lol.
It's never too late to start over. God gives us a fresh start everyday and He will be there to encourage us to keep going. He's love never fails.
So I have had a past with quite a few guys and I used to kinda be proud of it. I used to "brag" about how many guys I'd fooled around with and I thought it was cool. (How is that cool?! You just look like a SLUT! ahaha, gahhh so dumb!) So anyways, I've recently decided that I am sick of the way I just let guys treat me or how I change just because of a guy. That's not me. I have changed in my heart but I haven't actaully done anything about it to show it outwardly. Well after mannnyyyyy long hours of debating whether or not I want to really take a stand on this I have decided that if I don't I am just leaving a door open to allow the enemy to attack me. I am serious, I am no longer playing the games everyone plays. I have played the games and I know how to play them well but it's not fun because I end up gettin attached or he gets attached more than we planned and I or he will get hurt. My heart can't handle being hurt anymore. Seriously, I think that if I have another heart break I will need serious counsel, I'm not kidding or exaggerating.
So I know it seems like a small step but to me it's huge. I have a clear boundary and proud of it. I have stopped responding to those guys that text me super late cause they are "bored" yeaahhh I'm not dumb, I know what you want. I also have decided that unless we are dating, flirting is all you get of me. I have self control and I know how to use it now and I will not back down. I don't like losing and this is a battle that I will win. I know to not even put myself in those situations where things could even lead to something more.
I know that this is a huge step in my life and I know that there is going to be opposition but I know that with God on my side I can do anything. If I stumble for some reason I am not going to beat myself up. I am going to get right back up on that horse and go even harder than before. I am old enough, wise enough, and more mature to just keep doing what I have done since high school. I am not that same person and there needs to be a outward change for everyone to see.
I normally would be upset that I even had to struggle with what to do because it would seem like such an easy decision to make for some but the fact I struggled whether or not to do this makes me that much stronger. I have gone back and forth over this and I know it may get hard but in the end I know it will be worth it and I will save myself so many emotional roller coster rides, lol.
It's never too late to start over. God gives us a fresh start everyday and He will be there to encourage us to keep going. He's love never fails.
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